#Kavyotsav
(Topic: Emotions)
The story of my Insecurity.
When your legs shake and shiver
Turned into frozen solid.
When your heart is imploding
With the nightmare memory you had as kid.
That they all laughed,
Or nobody noticed.
Yes, I am an introvert,
And stage fright—my leading insecurity.
What if they do giggle,
What if they ignore
What if they yawn as I act,
What If they get bored
And if I forget something,
or not deliver what they expect,
I would again stand there blank! As a joke
And loose all the respect that I possibly even had.
I would be a clown for people to laugh on,
Not that I didn’t wish to be one
I just don’t ever want my heart to know,
That there is something by me that can’t be done.
Because I know my heart, and its self respect.
It would be dead scared to even attempt
Even what I would be damn good at.
That would forever be concealed
It’s the greatest threat,
And I couldn’t beat that.
But one day, one day when I sat ,
Watching Dark Knight.
With lappy on my Lap.
I saw the protagonist,
And my eyes sparkled that that is the man, the man I aspire to be.
Not exactly a masked one but instead superhero figuratively
Imagine when Bruce wore that mask wouldn’t he have felt insecure?
Won’t even batman himself felt numb and fear bound?
But watch what he got when the cure was finally found.
It must have took guts even for him too to crush the in from insecure.
It’s fiction story you may argue,
But isn’t every story supposed to deliver a moral value.
Everyone is scared. Everybody’s throught gets dry.
But the one who climbs the cliff off wins. Is afterall, what I learned from mountain dew
I realized I have an urge, a hunger.
The crowds genuine claps were my drug, my alcohol.
That it only gets quenched when I hear compliments and applause.
But I need to break the quiver barrier.
And so is it that I attempt,
To slay the horrendous dragon.
With every public appearance that I make,
And with every clap as an arrow
I pierce its every organ.
For the days to follow.
The war has begun
I am not going to stop fighting my fear.
Either will I or would it, succumb to death.
As I have promised with my life,
That I will write his epitaph with its oozing blood myself.
