Disturbed
(An investigative, romantic and psychological thriller)
By
Kotra Siva Rama Krishna
I hissed out heavily. May be Nova is right. Why should her husband still stay in my room?
“Nova do you really believe in spirits?” I asked her straightly.
“Yes madam. I believe in spirits.”
“From when you have started believing in devils?” I asked Nova again.
“After my husband’s death. From the moment he first contacted me as a spirit.” Her voice shivered little while saying that.
“Why he first contacted you as a spirit? Why he had become a spirit in the first place?” I am finding an odd interest in the matter even in my uneasiness also.
“My husband is too much concerned about us madam. He loves me and my children a lot. So…” now tears are flowing down on her cheeks. “As a spirit also he has been coming to us and looking after our welfare. In fact just because of his love on us he cannot dissolve himself into universe, he remained as a spirit and visiting on us often.”
“Alright, alright. Don’t worry. I should not have made you worried like this.” I hastily said.
“No, madam. It is not at all so.” Nova wiped her tears away with the back of her hand and is saying again. “You are valuing me and my husband a lot. So you are asking all these. You are not considering my experience as just nonsense. Moreover you are not taking me as a psychological patient.”
Her saying so jerked me. A psychological patient! I myself so. I don’t know what more to say then.
“Madam if you don’t mind I want to say something to you.” With a little voice Nova said.
“Tell me Nova, what it is? You need not hesitate to say anything to me.” While looking into her face with new interest I said.
“My husband is saying that you are in danger. He asked me to intimate you that you should be careful.”
I jolted at once on hearing that. I forgot to think but how Nova’s husband knows that I am in danger.
“How your husband knows that I am in danger Nova?” with surprise I asked her.
“I cannot say madam. I did not ask him how he knows about that. I became very much upset after knowing your life is in danger.”
I just don’t know how to take whatever Nova is saying now.
“After you have recruited me like this in your office, my husband has got a special affection on you. He does not want anything bad happens to you. In fact to protect you from danger he came here on this day.”
I am dumbfounded on hearing that. Nova’s husband knows that my life is in danger. He has come to this office particularly to help me and to save me from danger. Is this Nova trying to play some game with me? Frowns gathered on my forehead and I am straight looking into the face of Nova. There is nothing else but concern and regard about my safety.
“What type of danger I am in then? Did he say anything about it?” I am still continuing seeing like that.
“No madam he did not say anything like that. What all he said is your life is in danger and you need to be careful.”
There is heavy silence and the uneasiness in me is thickened even more. “Will you make your husband talk with me also Nova? I want to know something from him.”
I am observing Nova keenly now. “I sure can madam. But it is not possible here. You have to come to my home.” After few seconds she said.
“I sure do come to your home Nova.” I said.
&&&
“What Dazzle? What you are saying? You are believing whatever that Nova said to you is true, is it is not?” there is abundant surprise in the face of Viola.
“It appears quite true Ola. What is the necessity to Nova to lie to me?”
“I am not saying that Ola lied to you. But in my opinion, no, not just my opinion, surely she is a psychological patient and imagining her husband so. It is nothing more than that. You are making her psychological problem even more intensive giving importance to it like this.”
I don’t know what to say to it then.
“In my opinion she must have treatment Dazzle. Otherwise she would be turned as a complete schizophrenic.” Viola said with firmness in her voice.
“No I am not thinking like that.”
“Let me come with you on tomorrow. I shall observe her and see from what type of psychological disorder she is suffering.”
“I cannot allow you to do that Ola. I don’t feel good if she thinks I am exposed her to a psychologist making her as a psychological patient.”
“She is a psychological patient indeed. You are doing it only for her good. There is no wrong whatsoever in it.”
“No, I cannot do that. I have no objection in your coming to my office all the time but I don’t like your treating Nova as a psychological patient showing yourself as a psychologist there.”
“Alright then, I am not going to show myself as a psychologist there. I come there just as your friend and observe her.”
“There may be not much use Nova. She said that she asks her husband not to come to the office. If her late husband not present at her as a spirit she is a normal woman. You cannot find any difference in her then.”
“I shall see that also. First let me come to your office with you and spend some time with that Nova. Then I think I can tell what is the wrong with her.”
“If it is just like that, let it be so.” I said with a weak voice.
&&&
I was with him and his whole body engulfed me while he was feverishly planting kisses on my face. My both hands were just encircled him letting him do whatever he wanted just remained as a passive observer. Pleasure was unbearable to me and I was making sounds involuntarily and he was quite irrelevant of everything else just completely indulged in whatever he was doing.
Suddenly I am looking ahead while my body is burning with desire. The sudden attack of the memory of that day created a strong urge in me and that urge is torturing me. My god! My throat completely drained and it is aching. I am terribly feeling thirsty also and I desperately want to drink water. But I am remembering now that day’s experience which I have got while I went to the refrigerator to drink water. Nathaniel, it was Nathaniel on that day. He said his name then. Again my mind is bringing back the memories of Nathaniel. What is going to happen now? Would Nathaniel come here again as a spirit? Did he cause the memory to me just seconds before?
I am remembering the words of Nova. Nova said her husband is coming to her as a spirit. If Nova’s husband is coming to her as a spirit, what is the surprise in Nathaniel and Chuck coming to me as spirits? But I don’t want either of them coming to me as spirits.
I just cannot manage anymore without drinking water. I must have it first whatever may happen later on. I got off from the bed and am now slowly walking towards the fridge. I opened the door of it, took the bottle from it and drained the water in it without stopping. Now I am feeling relaxed. Still I am feeling uneasy and fearful but after drinking the water I am feeling relaxed to some degree. I put the empty bottle on the fridge and came back to the bed and tossed myself on it again.
I desperately want to sleep but these unnecessary thoughts are not leaving me. They are in fact torturing me a lot. I just don’t know how to escape from these torturing thoughts. I am thinking if I can manage to come out of these unnecessary thoughts half of the problem would be solved. Early in the morning I shall ask Ola to tell me a way to escape from these thoughts.
I deeply breathed and hissed out heavily and am trying to get into sleep. Oh, what a nice thing sleep is! I don’t need to bother about anything at all. I am now witnessing the troubling thoughts in me are slackening slowly and slowly. I am hoping to fall asleep soon.
I am suddenly started feeling a heavy weight on my body. It is that much heavier and I am feeling suffocating. Just before I go into sleep, what is happening? I cannot understand. I am trying to know what it is and yes….it is a human body. I am feeling its legs and hands etc. on me. Now I am remembering the previous rape on me. Chuck raped me brutally on that day. Is Chuck once again trying to rape me? How many times I am going to be subjected to rapes like these?
“Chuck” did I say it really? I don’t know. I am trying to move my organs but I cannot move any of them even an inch. It is just like someone spellbound me not to move. I am not able to open even my eyes. But I am feeling my agitated breathing.
“I am Nathaniel, Dazzle.” There is a violent kiss on my right cheek.
“Nathaniel!” it is like I am talking but I cannot move my lips.
“Yes, Nathaniel. Your great lover and friend. We both enjoyed a lot together. Have you forgotten all about that?”
“You were never my lover Nathaniel. We were just friends. Yes, we have enjoyed together. I agree.” I am really saying all that to him or strongly feeling saying that so to him I cannot understand.
“You just don’t know Dazzle. I always loved you and still I am in love with you. I am a great lover to you.” He made another violent kiss on my left cheek and is saying. “I cannot remain without you Dazzle. So I have come.”
“Please go away from me.” I am yelling now or I am feeling like yelling I don’t know. “I don’t want any of that from you.”
“Why? We have enjoyed it a lot in the past.” There is anguish in his voice.
“Might be. But I am not liking any of that now. You are saying that you are my great lover. If it is true just leave me and go away.”
But there is no answer from him to what I have said. Now my lips are crushing under the lips of that creature. I am clear that this creature, whether it is Nathaniel or his spirit or something else, is not going to leave me without enjoying me. I am going to be raped once again by a spirit! A spirit of Nathaniel! Early in the morning when I say all this to Viola, she would say all this is just my imagination, nothing more than that. Viola promised me to come and sleep with me but she did not. I know why she did not. She wants that again from Williams. Knowing that very well I did not compel Viola to come and sleep in my bed room.
But that ghastly and terrible thing is going on, on my body and I am completely helpless to stop that. I am feeling rage and insult than fear. How an onslaught can happen on my body without my consent? How that dirty devil Nathaniel can satisfy himself against my wish and desire? The ironical thing is, even my psyche is completely opposing the same, my body is enjoying it just it enjoyed at one time.
Suddenly the weight over me disappeared and I am feeling free again. At once I can move myself quite free on the bed. Quite surprisingly, there is no difference whatsoever in my body. The dressing on my body is just as it was before! Before that ghastly incident! There is no surprise in Viola’s saying that all my experiences are just my imagination and nothing real. In fact I cannot convince myself that it is real.
(I hope that you enjoyed upto here. I shall publish the next chapter as soon as possible. Please don’t forget to rate and review.)
