- 22 -
Next morning when Rani was putting second parantha in Ramesh’s plate, his eyes fell on the solitaire ring. He asked, “When did you buy this ring?”
Rani cursed and scolded herself for her carelessness and stupidity. On the one hand, she was so careful about the bouquet, and on the other hand, committed the blunder of not removing the ring. Trying to hide her feelings of discomfort and not letting uneasiness show on her face, she quickly thought of an answer and said, “I bought it yesterday.”
Despite best of her efforts, she could not remain normal. Noticing her uneasiness and relying on his gut feeling, Ramesh put a sarcastic question, “You bought it or ‘someone’ has given it to you?”
Rani thought resignedly that now it was futile to hide the truth, so, without caring for the consequences, she replied that Alok had gifted it on her birthday.
Ramesh’s sarcastic tone turned into wrath. His eyes became red. Burning with anger, he said, “After talking to Vinay, I had thought that you would respect his advice and keep your friendship within limits and this friendship won’t create a rift in our life. But I was in the wrong. Dog’s tail remains always crooked. It seems that the sanctity of all relationships has become meaningless to you. You’ve crossed all the limits. For you, the dignity of the family has no relevance. The relationship of a husband and wife is based on trust, but you’ve shattered the trust. ‘He’ remembers even your birthday and gives you such an expensive gift. It can’t be possible just because of friendship. You guys have gone far beyond friendship. Don’t forget that men and women are like bamboos growing in the forest. Fire doesn’t come from anywhere outside; it’s produced by their own friction. Surge of youth in the old age leads only to destruction.”
Ramesh gave full vent to his anger. Rani was terrified. She felt the ground slipping under her feet, and darkness engulfing her eyes. Trying to control herself after taking stock of Ramesh’s outburst, she asked, “What do you want to say?”
“You understand very well what I mean. Don’t act naive …”
Just then, the doorbell rang and Lachhmi came in. Ramesh got up from the dining table leaving his breakfast and conversation unfinished. He got ready in a hurry. As he was about to leave for office, Rani tried to hand over the Tiffin to him.
“I don’t need Tiffin,’ saying this, Ramesh stamped his feet and went out of the house.
After he left, Lachhmi asked Rani, “Madam Ji, if you don’t mind, may I ask you something?”
Even though Rani was not in a mood to answer any question at this juncture, since she was her companion of loneliness, so, she didn’t refuse and said, “Yes, ….”
“Madam Ji, today Sahib Ji looked quite upset, did anything wrong happen?”
With the intention to avoid revealing the truth, Rani said, “No, nothing wrong has happened. Such skirmishes keep happening in all the homes. You do your work.”
Lachhmi felt that today Madam didn’t want to talk about herself like other days. So, she got busy in her work. Rani came to the bedroom and lay down mentally exhausted. She thought over the turn of events that had taken toll in her life. ‘Only yesterday morning, the first rain of Sawan had welcomed her birthday with its auspicious arrival. Alok’s company had kept her happy and excited the whole day. And today…..! Not only has yesterday’s happiness vanished, there is no clear answer to the questions like what would happen next, what turn the events would take? Yesterday while bidding farewell, Alok had wished me ‘Always be happy’, but look what happened! His prayers went in vain. What should I do now?’ When she could not think of any answer, a voice came from her inner self - ‘Only Alok can suggest a solution.’ And Rani started waiting for Lachhmi to leave. She didn't want to sound alarm, so did not ask her to speed up. As soon as she finished her work and said, “Madam Ji, I’m going” and closed the outside door, Rani looked at the wall clock. It was half past eleven. Hoping that Alok had not left, she called him, “Alok, are you still in the hotel?”
“I’m about to leave, what’s the matter? You sound worried?” Hearing Rani’s choked voice, he asked.
“Please come home. I’ll explain on your arrival.”
“Relax. I’m coming in a few minutes.”
Within fifteen minutes, he reached Rani's house. As soon as he rang the doorbell, Rani opened the door. Alok was shocked to see her sagging body and pale face. Glow had left her face. They went straight to the bedroom. Alok sat on the settee. Rani sat next to him, and put her head on his shoulder. She started sobbing. She sounded helpless. Tears started flowing intermittently from her eyes and sparkled on her cheeks like dewdrops on the grass. Sensing her upset state of mind, while caressing her back with one hand and wiping her tears with the other, Alok asked, “Tell me, what happened?”
“…….”
Rani remained silent. Her silence said more than the words. Alok’s sympathy and closeness broke all the barriers. She hid her face in his lap and burst out weeping.
Comforting her, Alok said, “Relax and tell me, what’s bothering you? You’re a brave girl, don’t act so weak? …. Don't waste these tears, they’re very precious.”
“…....”
She could not speak for long and kept sobbing. Alok continued to caress her back. Some moments passed. Rani got some solace, some assurance from Alok’s touch. She felt herself protected. Finally, she slowly told everything in detail. She told how she had forgotten to take off the ring at night and how Ramesh noticed it at breakfast-time and asked about it, how she told everything truthfully. She repeated Ramesh’s reaction verbatim. After listening to everything, Alok advised her calm down, but he himself was shaken up and worried.
Rani, “The matter is not over, Alok. I’m afraid that when Ramesh Ji returns home at night, I don’t know how the bomb would explode?”
Suppressing his anxiety and consoling her, Alok said, “Rani, getting worried doesn’t solve any problem, it can be got rid of only by being patient. There’s nothing wrong in our love. ….. You had already accepted me as your own in our childhood. You know very well that I’m with you. Come what may, I’ll be with you till my last breath. You had once said that we would keep our friendship away from the eyes of the world. A question had arisen in my mind as to how long could we keep it hidden. Sooner or later, the truth would come out in the open because love and smell can’t be hidden for long….. Whatever is Ramesh Ji’s reaction at night, share the same with me tomorrow. If you so desire, I can cancel my plan to go to Patiala today. I’ll stay somewhere in Chandigarh or Mohali.”
Rani felt relieved to hear that Alok would stay. She herself wanted him not to go away from her. Alok brought a glass of water from the kitchen and gave it to her. She took only two sips, Alok gulped down the rest. Then he asked, “Should I make tea?”
“No, it’s lunch-time. Everything is ready. Let’s take lunch together.”
“I’ve just had breakfast. I won’t be able to eat now.”
“But I’ve not eaten anything since morning tea.”
“In that case, bring whatever you’ve prepared. How can I let you stay hungry?”
Rani took out the food from the Tiffin left behind by Ramesh and mixed it with the rest of the food and heated the same. They ate together. After the meals, they kept talking about the possible future scenario for quite some time. They fell asleep while talking. When they woke up, it was about five. After taking tea, Alok suggested to go to Sukhna lake or Rose Garden but Rani requested him to stay with her as long as he could. Finally, it was decided that Alok would stay in a hotel for the night and in the morning, Rani would tell him about whatever had happened and only after chalking out further plans, Alok would go to Patiala.
…….
In the morning, after seeing the solitaire ring on Rani’s finger, Ramesh’s doubt about her friendship with Alok turned into belief and he decided to talk to Rani in unambiguous terms, but the matter remained inconclusive because of Lachhmi’s arrival. He spent the whole day in the office in restlessness and made up his mind to take a final decision in the matter in the evening.
Ramesh reached home at around 8:30 pm. Rani asked, “Did you take anything for lunch or not?”
Ramesh rudely replied, “How does it matter to you whether I eat or not?”
Rani replied patiently, “It matters to me, that’s why I ask. You had left the breakfast unfinished in the morning and hadn’t carried even the Tiffin.”
“Now leave these pretensions. Tell me, did you celebrate your birthday here or somewhere else?”
Rani was at a loss about how to articulate a reply.
Seeing her silent, Ramesh became furious and vented out his anger and said, “I’m asking you something, why don’t you answer? Why are you tongue tied?”
Rani thought that now to suppress the truth would mean to tell lies, one after the other. Some people are adept in this art, but Rani could not do so. She narrated the entire incident as it happened.
After listening to her, Ramesh lost temper and gave full vent to his wrath, “We’re living together for almost forty years, but you never let me know that someone else dwells in your heart and not me, with whom you took the sacred vows before the fire. What a betrayal! You’ve torn apart the tender emotional thread that kept us bound for years together. What a womanly character! It’s rightly said, ‘Frailty thy name is woman’. Our scriptures say that even gods couldn’t fathom a woman’s mind, what to talk of a man! I won’t snatch someone else’s right, nor would I share the right that you’ve voluntarily given to me. Enough is enough. I can’t tolerate it anymore.”
Ramesh’s fiery arrows pierced Rani through and through, still she didn’t retort. She thought it better to follow the saying, ‘Keeping quiet is better than thousand answers’. When she felt that Ramesh has calmed down a bit, she again asked him to take meals. But he outrightly refused, changed his clothes and lay down. In such a situation, even Rani could not eat. After some time, Rani came after changing her clothes. As she began to sit on the bed, Ramesh said not in anger but in a tired voice, “After all this, I can’t share the bed with you. Leave me alone. Go and sleep in the other room. I’ll decide what to do next after consulting a lawyer.”
Sensing the gravity of the situation, Rani meekly went to the other room. They were lying in separate rooms. Despite best of their efforts, sleep was far away from their eyes. Heightened heart-beat had sucked out their mental peace. Various scenes of their past life kept looming large before their eyes. Both of them had their own worries, about each-other and apart from each-other, which kept them awake. The sounds of their breathing and turning sides kept piercing the silence of the night.
Around twelve o’clock, power failed. AC stopped. The fan kept running because it was connected to the inverter. The cooling effect of the AC lasted for a while and then it started getting warm and humid. If Rani had fallen asleep, she might not have realised it, but in the suffocating humid atmosphere, it was very difficult to remain lying down on the foam mattresses. So, she got up and opened the back door of the bedroom. She spread the folding bed in the courtyard, turned on the pedestal fan and lay down and covered herself a thin sheet. While lying down, she looked up. The night-goddess’s Saree studded with stars and sequins was spread all around in the sky. Power was restored in about ten minutes but Rani found it more pleasant under the open sky than to return to the closed room, because the fragrance of the tuberose coming with wind from the neighbouring courtyard was soothing her hurt soul. Absorbing this fragrance, she fell asleep in a short while.
Rani got up as usual but she didn’t try to peek into Ramesh’s room until she heard Ramesh going to the bathroom. She made tea after fifteen minutes. She went to Ramesh’s room with tea and biscuits. As she entered with the tea, Ramesh burst out, “Take it away. I don’t need tea etc.”
“You’re annoyed with me. It’s your right. I can’t say anything. But please take tea. You didn’t take even dinner. Give punishment to me, but don’t punish yourself.”
Ramesh’s anger subsided a bit after hearing Rani’s last words. Reluctantly, he picked up a cup of tea. To give an opportunity to him to have tea in peace, Rani left the plate of biscuits and picked up her cup and came to the lobby. After having tea, Rani got busy in the kitchen as usual. Neither did she ask anything about breakfast and lunch, nor Ramesh stopped her from preparing the same. She finished all the kitchen work before Lachhmi’s arrival. When Ramesh got ready after bathing etc., Rani served him the breakfast and kept the Tiffin ready on the table. After having breakfast, Ramesh picked up the Tiffin and left for the office.
Rani called Alok immediately after Lachhmi left. Alok was eagerly waiting for her call.
Rani said, “Alok, don’t ask anything, we’ll talk on meeting. Take me somewhere till evening. I feel suffocating in the house. I desperately need your company.”
“I’m reaching just in ten minutes. Keep ready.”
He disconnected the phone and came to the reception counter. After paying the bill, he drove the car towards Rani’s house.
……
Rani was ready and waiting for Alok. She came out immediately on hearing car’s sound and sat on the seat next to him.
Alok asked, “Where should we go?”
“It’s upto you. Right now I’m not in a state of mind to take any decision. Just bear in mind that should we return by 7 pm.”
Alok started the car and switched on the music. The programme ‘VBS Ke Tarane SMS Ke Bahane’ was going on on Vividha Bharati and Mukesh’s song was playing:
Kisi ki muskrahaton pe ho nisar
Kisi ka dard mil sake to ley udhar
Kisi ke vaste ho tere dil mein pyar
Jeena isi ka naam hai.’
(Impressed by someone's smile
If possible borrow someone’s sorrow
Have love for someone in your heart
This’s what life’s all about.)
The last song of the programme was:
Hum tere bin ab rah nahin sakate
Tere bina kya wajood mera…
(I can no longer live without you
What’s my existence without you..)
Despite not being in a normal state of mind, Rani exclaimed, “Alok, you’re still fond of Vividha Bharati programmes!”
“Rani, call it nostalgia or whatever, I find most of today’s songs absurd. They’re nothing but noise and have no melody or rhythm. Even today, one can enjoy evergreen songs in most of the Vividha Bharati programmes.”
Alok turned the car towards Chandigarh-Shimla road and stopped at Timber Trail Tourist Complex, just above Parwanoo. Getting down from the car, he said, “Let’s have lunch first, you must not have eaten anything till now! Then we’ll go up by the rope-way.”
“As you please.”
After having lunch, they went up. Most of the people were sitting in the restaurant or in their rooms. Only a few were strolling there. The weather here was pleasant as compared to down there. There was no sunshine. The intermittent drizzle was imparting coolness both to the body and mind. It was pleasant to roam around. After bearing with the drizzle for a couple of minutes, Alok said, “Let’s go and sit somewhere in the shelter for a while. What’s the use of getting wet?”
“It’s only drizzling, even if there had been a torrential rain, I would still have preferred to get drenched than take a shelter. It’s not only cooling the body but also the mind. Alok, I’m reminded of the childhood days when while getting drenched in the rain, we used to hum: ‘Rabba Rabba Meenh Barsa, Saadi Kothi Daane Paa.” (O God! let there be rain and fill our godown with grain.)
“It’s true. There’s a different kind of pleasure in carefreeness of childhood, a life free from all kinds of worries.”
While talking, Rani told Alok how Ramesh had behaved last night, what he said and how she spent the night alone for the first time in her own house despite Ramesh being there. Alok started thinking, but he did not let Rani sense that he was worried. He continued to console her. When they were tired after roaming around, they entered the restaurant. While having tea, Rani said, “Although I’m feeling physically exhausted, my mental strain has lessened considerably.”
“Good. Getting rid of mental strain makes one healthy physically as well. If the mind is unhealthy, the body can’t remain healthy, but a healthy mind can remain in an unhealthy body. The cause of most of today’s diseases is unhealthy mind. Here we’re away from the hustle and bustle of the city life and close to nature; rather we’re sitting in the lap of nature. The atmosphere all around is enough to fill the body and soul with freshness. These beautiful moments are spreading emotional feelings in the mind.”
Rani teased him, “Alok, the way we’re roaming around together, must have rekindled similar memories of your college or university days!”
Alok was not attentive to Rani’s teasing. He answered seriously, “Rani, when I had visited your house, you had put a similar question and my answer was – ‘after you had left for Jalandhar and till Rashmi came into my life, I couldn’t even think of any other girl.’ My answer remains the same.”
Rani said in a tinkling voice, “Alok, you’ve become serious, I was just joking.”
“Oh! Thank God, you’ve undergone a sea change after coming over here.”
After taking tea, they came down and left for the home.
After dropping her, Alok went to Patiala but only after taking a promise that whatever the situation is, she will keep him updated, and if needed, he would reach her without delay.
*****
