Rain Flower
Kotra Siva Rama Krishna
‘Don’t feel shy, it would be wonderful.’ While he was hesitating to do what she said, she said.
Still he was hesitating. This game was different. They both played many games until that day, but never this type of.
‘Just make your pant down by unbuttoning it.’ Her voice was like an order.
‘Never.’ His voice was strong and he was pretty irritated by her persistence.
‘I am saying that you can enjoy it.’ Now there was pleading in it. Some urgency which was he could not understand.
‘If one time you do it, every time you ask for it.’ She said again. There was promise in her voice.
‘No, I am not going to be naked myself first.’ He stubbornly said.
‘I understood.’ She nodded her head and took of all her clothes from her body. She was steady while doing that and it took maximum one minute or so.
They both were in the storeroom of her house. She was of the same age of him, just twelve years or so. Her thin body was glistening in gold color in the little light available there.
‘Now I have become completely naked myself. Still you are having a problem?’
It was very first time to him to observe a girl completely naked like that. Automatically he started making himself naked while his gaze was sweeping her completely. He was little acquainted with sexual matters and the completely naked body of her was creating a sort of thrill in him. He found his mouth and lips dry and tried to wet his lips with his tongue.
Suddenly he found his fingers shivering and it became more when he reached his pants. Anyhow he managed himself to become completely naked. As he was observing her also completely naked before him, he stopped feeling ashamed. Then she slowly reached him, put both her hands around his neck before hugging him strongly. Then it was not just thrill, a sort of joy which was unbearable and unexplainable sweeping all over his body. He enjoyed her perfunctory kisses on his cheeks as much as he enjoyed her hug. His mind became numb and he just followed her like a zombie while she was leading him to a table there.
***
Williams at once woke up and he felt his mouth rock dry. He did not know why but he was feeling uncomfortable and inconvenient. He sat up on the bed and looked beside where Rose was sleeping peacefully. Just before going into sleep they both have sex to his heart’s content. Rose also enjoyed it fully and he knew it. He got off the bed, went near to the refrigerator there, took a bottle from it and drank half of the water in it without stopping. After quenching his thirst, he felt little relaxed. He once again came near to the bed and put himself in the previous position. Then involuntarily his mind started remembering the dream he just had.
‘Is it is just a dream?’ he wondered. The girl appeared quite familiar to him as if she was a part of his life. ‘Was it a part of my past?’ he was in confusion. ‘Am I remembering my past like this?’ he was furiously thinking
“What?” with his smooth touch on her cheek Rose woke up. “Even you have forgotten most of your past what you don’t forgotten at all is doing that. You did it to me like an animal just before going to sleep. Do you want it again?” she smiled.
“Not of course.” He said uneasily. “I want to say something to you.”
“Tell me what it is.” She noticed the change in his voice. He explained his dream in a measured tone.
Then, she suddenly remembered, what Williams said immediately after her sexual intercourse with him which made him come to his senses. ‘It is just like that’. That was what he said. Then itself she understood he partially remembered some sexual enjoyment in his past life. In fact that joy he had in the previous sexual experience before that day also had a role in making him come to his senses. After having the joy in sex with her, which was similar to the joy he had before, his subconscious tried to link them both. Now a day it was not that much surprising that people do have sexual experiences before marriage. She did not think about it much.
“So what? Sometimes we do have these types of dreams. Nothing to discuss.” She yawned heavily readying herself to sleep again. “Nothing of that sort now please.”
“I also have no intention.” He irritated. “I am thinking that might be a piece of my past. I felt that girl quite familiar to me.”
She became alert. ‘Is he remembering his past?’ she too sat up parallel to him. “Can you remember anything more?”
“No.” he nodded his head in negation. “But that girl is appearing to me as if I have known her very well.”
She tried to remember the girl name that Jasmine said to her. Suddenly it popped up into her mind. “Does the name ‘Rita’ sound anything familiar to you?”
He closed his eyes and knitted his brows. After few seconds he opened his eyes but kept the frowns. “No, why you have asked?”
“I came to know that you used to have a girl friend by name ‘Rita’” observing the expression on his face Rose carefully said.
“Is that so? I cannot remember anything.” Williams despairingly said.
“Alright. Don’t force yourself to remember anything.” Rose tried to say that easily feeling fear inside her.
“But what that bloody dream! I just cannot think I did that to a girl just at such a tender age. What the bloody hell of my past is?”
“Oh, Williams just go into sleep.” She tracked the programming she made with him while treating him. She put her hand and leg on him and kissed on his cheek. She breathed deeply and started saying in a measured and slow voice. “Now you fell asleep. ……………….You are feeling relaxed ………………your eyelids are becoming heavier……………………”
“No….but………….” he was trying to say something still.
“Your mind follows only my instructions…………… you are falling asleep…………..you cannot remain anymore awaken…………………you are falling asleep……………..you are falling asleep.”
He soon started snoring. Rose did not remember when she had fallen asleep.
***
“What are you doing my son?”
Williams startled and looked at the side where from that voice has come. There was the woman standing at the entrance who has been said was his mother.
“Please come inside mom.” Williams got off from the chair and invited that woman into his room.
She straight came, hugged him and kissed on his right cheek. “Don’t you remember anything about me my son?” her voice shivered while asking that.
He nodded his head helplessly. “No mom. I cannot remember anything. I am trying but….”
‘Never force him to remember anything. There should not be any pressure on his brain. The remembrance should be natural course. If we force him to remember anything it may have serious consequences.’ She remembered what Rose said.
“No son. No. Don’t try to remember anything. Even you don’t remember anything there is no problem. I am your mother and you are my son. I always remember that and there is no problem.”
Williams made a long breath and hissed out. “But forgetting everything and living like a dummy. I am feeling very bad.”
“Son, please, please. Don’t talk like that. Everything you do remember in due course. You can become your sportive, active personality again. Just wait.”
“Am I used to be a sports person? So active?” it was critical to him thinking about himself so.
“A very big and good sports man. You were always the champion in your college sports. You liked football a lot even you played other sports also.” The loving and admiring expression in her eyes was so clear to him. He need not have any other proof to say that she was his mother
As they both were talking like that there came another man with coffee cups in a tray. “Dibbu.” Williams said.
“Can you remember me Sir?” Dibbu’s face lit up with pleasure. He put the tray on a nearby table and asked.
“No. I cannot remember anything prior to that day. But I can remember things whatever happened after that day.” Williams said. “I heard many a time that you have been called as Dibbu.”
“He cannot remember even me. How you are expecting that he can remember you?” Margaret said with irritation in her face.
“My God! What this is? How our Williams sir used to be?” there were tears in the corners of Dibbu’s eyes.
“Don’t create a scene here. Williams is already upset. Get out of this place.” Margaret snapped at him.
Dibbu immediately retired from that place.
“For how long he is working with us?” Looking at the side that Dibbu has gone, Williams asked.
“For more than thirty years. He was working with us from the time even before your birth. He used to be quite staunch and loyal to your father. After you father; he is so with us.”
“But you are strict and angry with him sometimes.” Williams said
“In whichever way he may be with us, he is a servant. Don’t forget that fact.”
It was difficult to him to agree with his mother’s philosophy but he did not say anything.
Settling themselves comfortably in the chairs, they talked for some more time.
***
“Mind is of two types Williams. Proposing mind and analyzing mind. Proposing mind always puts forward some or other thought. It never stops. The analyzing mind considers, analyses, elaborates and dwells upon the thoughts puts forward by proposing mind. You cannot stop proposing mind. It is not possible. But you can control the analyzing mind.” when they sat face to face in his reading room, Rose said to Williams.
“I can understand only little.” Williams said.
“No, problem.” She paused for a moment before continuing. “Just observe yourself. Always some or other thought comes into your mind. You cannot stop those thoughts at all. They do just come. If you try to stop them they become even more in number, even more intensifying. The best thing is don’t try to stop your proposing mind.”
“Then,” there was a smile on his lips.
“Your mind considers and elaborates every thought that pop up into your mind. Suppose a thought pop up into your mind regarding your quarrel with your friend into your mind. Then your mind considers it, elaborates it, judges it and worries about it. You cannot stop your proposing mind putting that thought into your mind. But you sure can stop elaborating and worrying on it.”
“Really! Really it is possible like that?” his interest on the topic made Rose even more enthusiastic.
“It just needs a little practice.”
“A little practice in your words means lot of.” He complained.
She mellifluously laughed and said. “It is not so here. Just start practicing it and it would be possible.”
“Anyhow, what you are saying is interesting to me to hear. Go on, say something more like this.”
“If you start thinking about your mind its strength weakens. As long as you leave your mind behind and gives control to it, it reins over you. But once you understand the nature of it and face it boldly, it becomes a puppy to you. Now the task before you is to separate yourself form the mind.”
“Separating myself from the mind? How it is possible? You have not discussed these types of matters before.” The interest in him was picked up even more.
“Yes, it is surprising to hear, but it is true. You are not the mind, you are just the observer of the mind. Once you realize yourself that you are not the mind but observing it always, you can have complete control over it.”
(I hope that you enjoyed the story till here. I update the next chapter as soon as possible. Don’t forget to rate and review this story)
