The road less travelled
In leisure time or specifically idle time, I used to meet several of my country side friends, childhood friends, some educationalists, scholars, wildlifers and sometimes intellectuals. For many months while sipping a cup of tea our topic of discussion was only one. I used to ask “What is life?” All answered differently and all had their own logic of defining life. Some said that life is all about earning money, getting married and having children. Some friends define life as service to family and standing upto their expectations. Some said that life is a journey and we are the travellers. Some defined life as service to society and spreading knowledge. Many times I simply ask them to explain their answers in brief and then they had lot of arguments to prove themselves right. These discussions and arguments continued for a long time. When I was in ninth standard, I was given Bhagwad Gita to read. When I read whole Bhagwad Gita for as many as twenty – thirty times I began to understand the secrets of life. Life is a contradiction – it is everything and it is nothing. It is doing your duty properly. It is purely based on the principles of ‘Karma’. The message was quite clear – Our deeds make our destiny.
‘The road less travelled’ is a short lesson for anybody who is confused among choices. We like the word ‘safe’ very much. Most of us are taught in an early age “It is better to skip difficulties instead of facing them”. I am asking you a question “Is this a right lesson to be taught by parents, teachers, elders and friends?”
Children from a very young age become tentative and start avoiding difficult tasks and difficult situations. They skip exams or tests because they are afraid of results. They don’t go to play because they are give mild instructions of getting allergy attack due to dust. When they grow up they depend on others to take decisions on their behalf. When they finish their education they find themselves no where. In my life, I have met many graduates who simply can’t write a letter or an application in English though they have huge piles of academic certificates and degrees. “It is better to skip difficulties instead of facing them”. Do you agree with this now?
My dear friends I suggest you – accept those difficulties, face those challenges. I don’t say that you don’t follow the advice of your parents or teachers of friends or anybody else but you ask yourself first. Ask yourself, “Is every time the safe option the best option?” Your answer will probably be – A big NO. That means there are basic instincts in you which are challenging you at present.
Many of my colleagues and friends often discuss about their future and concerns and worries about future. Sometimes, they discuss about their children and their futures plans and even worry what if their children don’t meet their expectations. Some of the colleagues constantly worry about their jobs or business. Even some of the parents worry about business and jobs of their sons and daughters and even about their grandson’s or granddaughter’s academics. I listen everybody carefully and try to find out a common conclusion. Why everybody has to worry a lot? If you analyze this problem properly, you will get answers to many of your worries. Everybody has a reason to worry because somebody is not doing their work properly. The main reason for all the worries is the so called ‘Safe choices’ of the past.
Let’s elaborate this topic. I will give you a real life example of a Computer Engineer named Gopal. Gopal was an average boy in studies in his high school. He was from a well to do family. He was provided all the necessary things during his academic life. He passed Higher Secondary with second class and then pursued Computer Engineering because all his friends were going for that. After engineering, he felt that there was hardly any scope for better prospectus. He was offered salary which was similar to his pocket money. Some of his friends took similar jobs. Somehow, Gopal took the job and resigned it within two months. His friends continued to work even with less salary. He spent next six months idly and then again decided to take a job. His father managed a job for him but that job also lasted for three months. Two of his friends are at present successful professionals in Computer field. Gopal is still thinking what to do now? I ask you “Where was the real problem?” – Gopal’s attitude, his parents, his job, his friends or circumstances.
The solution is quite simple. Gopal was brought up in such an environment that he couldn’t learn the basic concept of life – Struggle for existence. His two friends became successful because they had made their own choice right from selection of career to survive in job. When his friends got chances, they changed their jobs and now both of them are successful. So, one thing is clear life is matter of choices and opportunities and how wisely we make choices and how we make the best use of opportunities.
Don’t follow the crowds, they will lead you no where.
You might be very familiar with the term “Mass hysteria” or the term “herd poisoning”. Mass hysteria means a nonsense that is accepted by a big group or you can say that a big group of people is living with a delusion that they are right. Herd poisoning is still more dangerous. When a big group is speaking lies because of ignorance, you start accepting that lie as a truth at all your levels and you start acting accordingly. The best possible remedy for both of these problems is ‘Don’t follow the crowds’. Think different, act different and be different. God has gifted us common sense. Use it. Ask yourself first. Mass hysteria is prevalent almost everywhere in colleges, business hubs, at offices and every place known to you. There are bullies who may justify their decisions in the name of customs or ‘safe choices’. These safe choices are like honey trap which weaken almost anybody. Take decisions on your own after listening to everybody.
The title ‘The road less travelled’ is a symbol of our desire to do something different. To achieve our goals in our own style. To do the thing which we like the most and to select a choice which we think good for us. We can ask everybody for their suggestions but the ultimate decision should be taken by us and we are responsible and we are committed with that decision.
Start taking small decisions first. Imagine a situation that you go to a shopping mall for buying clothes. Normally, you try the cloth and ask somebody
“How am I looking? Is this colour suits me? Is the fitting O.K.?”…..
Most of us stand in front of mirror and start thinking “Am I looking handsome/beautiful? No dear, just stand in front of mirror and ask yourself first. Then take suggestions of others. You will get the best answer from yourself. You can apply this formula in all the small decisions that you are going to take.
Now imagine a case of collective decision making. Your family wants to go in a tour. Everybody has a different choice. The elders wish to go to a place of worship with many temples and pilgrim places. Obviously they are right. The younger members of the family think that they should go to a theme park where they can enjoy thrilling rides. You want to go to place where you want to experience peace. You want to go a place where you can cherish nature and have wonderful time with your family. How will you take decisions as everybody has different and unique set of choices? The best possible solution is to do some research and find out places which meet some of choices. If you are successful in creating a win-win situation for all, this will help you a lot in all the stages of life. This is what you have to do anywhere and everywhere in case of collective decisions. If you find a creative solution, leadership skills are automatically started to develop.
Once you start taking decisions on your own, you will start enjoying the festival called life. Never hesitate to take decisions on your own. No matter how bolder the decision is! It will always come with a lesson for you.
‘The road less travelled’ is about Goals and ways of achieving goals of life. All the persons have their won goals. The people are bit confused among choices. This is a part of human nature to wobble among choices. The road less travelled means select a way of attaining your goal that is different. Though the different way may be challenging but few people before you might have travelled across that way. When you are offered a difficult way for attaining your goal please choose that way. There are no shortcuts to success. Shortcuts may prove to be fatal in a long run.
Let me give you my own example. I was brilliant in studies and completed Engineering with flying colours. I used to teach children at my house (on terrace) as a hobby and for pocket money. I got a government job with a good salary. In one year of job, I got equal amount from job as well as from tuitions at home. I was more engineer and less teacher. Job was going well but I never got satisfaction from it because I felt that something was missing. During job hours, I used to think about the lessons which I wanted to teach to the children, I used to prepare materials for them and I used to plan creative activities for them. On Sundays, I used to take them for small excursion trips to nearby places with wildlife and natural beauty. On many occasions, I used to show them my photo collections of wild animals. I used to tell the children my adventure stories. I was enjoying my life. Then, all of a sudden there was change waiting for me. My boss at job handed me a letter of transfer to a place which was 200 kms away from my hometown. In the beginning, I was pleased that I got a promotion letter but there was second though which was far more horrifying. The idea of leaving my children, the idea of leaving my passion for teaching and the idea of leaving my hobbies as a wildlifer shattered me into pieces. I was disturbed a lot.
My parents called a meeting at my house. Elders, wise men, colleagues of my office and many other intelligent people were invited for my counseling. All gave the same advice leave everything and go to the new place and accept only and only government job. The discussions lasted for two hours and they all remain firm. In the end, my father asked me. “What do you want to do?”
I firmly replied. “Father, I want to leave this job because it will never make me happy, I am tired of it. Don’t worry about me, I will run my tuition classes and I will achieve all my goals and never let you down. I will try my best to prove myself right.” I selected ‘The road less travelled’. All the wise men standing there were dumbfounded. One or two dared to tell me that ‘You are crazy, insane, mad….’
One person challenged me, “You will definitely repent throughout you life”. Some also told, “When you are in trouble, don’t come for help from us”. All were of the same opinion ‘Leaving this job is like missing a golden chance’.
This incident took place before 16 years but today I have proved all of them wrong. I chased my dream and accomplished all the goals. All those wise men who doubted me are now standing with my decision. The guys who called me crazy now sent their children to my class for English lessons and also mention that please give them some practical lessons of life. The guy who challenged me is now a big fan of mine and always appreciates my activities in public. The guys who once refused to help in future now take my help in supervising their office work and for all the correspondence in English. When I remind of that meeting before sixteen years, they just laugh and say that “We were right and you were wrong.”
My dear friends, ‘The road less travelled’ - is all and all about following your heart. If you think that a particular road suits you, run for it. If you think that this particular thing or work or goal is for you, go for it. Chase your dreams. Prove that you are right. I am sure that you will be successful and nothing can stop you.
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