Change, Tradition, and Parenting
Change is an opportunity. If you get the chance to change, go for it — but only if it brings betterment for others and for society.
Our Indian culture is rich in traditions, heritage, moral values, and dignity. One of the strongest beliefs we grow up with is respect for elders. But often, that respect is taken to mean that we cannot question, confront, or disobey them — no matter what. Because of this, many people don’t truly live for themselves. They follow rules made by the head of the family. Decisions are made for them, not by them.
I believe in independent parenting. To me, being a parent means being a guardian — someone who stands behind their child, not in front of them. Let the child make their own choices. If they fail, you are there to support them emotionally. The lessons they learn from failure will always be more powerful than lessons from control. When we make our own decisions, we are fully responsible for the outcome. If it’s fruitful, we rejoice. If not, we learn.
That doesn’t mean we live without guidance. Families are full of elders, parents, grandparents, uncles, and aunts who deeply care for us. If we sit with them, share our lives, and ask for advice, their experiences can act as accelerators for our growth. It doesn’t have to be one generation versus the other. It can be both — old and new — walking hand in hand.
What’s needed is respect for each other’s opinions, mutual understanding, and space. Privacy, after all, is the key to a healthy environment.
I think many parents struggle with the same problem: their kids don’t listen to them. The truth is, we often approach them in the wrong way. We start giving our learnings in the form of lectures — don’t do this, don’t do that. Even though we mean well, children tune us out.
We want to protect them from every fall, every mistake, every tear. But I believe we should let them cry, let them stumble, let them hit the stone. That’s how they learn. This universe, this nature around us, already has its own energy that protects us. Spiritually too, we are not alone — the Almighty who created us is always watching over us.
Indian culture has always respected the Guru–Shishya dharm — the bond between teacher and student. It teaches us sincerity, attentiveness, and faith in the guidance we receive. But life itself is also a Guru. The ups and downs, the struggles, the failures — all of these create our aura, our energy. If we keep it positive, life becomes easier to survive and even enjoy
Remember, life is a journey between birth and death. Those two are the only certainties. Everything in between — people, situations, emotions, relationships — is temporary. You cannot hold on to any of them forever.
My own journey with motherhood was critical because I was so raw. I didn’t know anything. I didn’t even know what labour pain was or how I would bring this child into the world. Before marriage, I didn’t even understand what physical intimy was. I had never been in a relationship before.
Looking back, I believe that before marriage, it’s important to experience a relationship with someone you feel truly attracted to. It shapes your character and your personality. A person outside your family or cousins can teach you lessons about love, trust, compromise, and self-awareness Even if the relationship doesn’t lead to marriage, it will still teach you what you want, what you need, and who you are.
This is so important, because marriage is not a small decision — 70% of your life depends on it. A good partner makes life easier, more joyful, more meaningful. A wrong match makes survival itself feel heavy.
And yet in India, so many of us don’t get to choose. We are told whom to marry. It’s unfair. Nature has given us the right to choose — to live freely, to speak, to travel, to laugh, and to love. Love is the key 🔐.
I say this because I have lived it. I have seen my own life shaped — and sometimes shaken — by the decision of marriage.
One thing I missed most during my journey was learning to love myself. Once you start accepting who you are, no one else can easily make you fall apart. People carry their own weaknesses and insecurities, and sometimes they try to push those onto others just to soothe their ego. Don’t let them.
Self-care isn’t selfish — it’s survival. Little acts of kindness toward yourself change everything: go for a spa day, get a facial, build a simple skincare routine, buy a dress that makes you smile, or take yourself out for a coffee. These things recharge you. They remind you that you matter.
Don’t give all of yourself away. Your body and soul belong to you. If you get sick, you are the one who must take your medicine. No one else can live your life or take credit for your strength, your beauty, or your confidence. Choose the people you let close to you carefully. There are billions of people in this world, but only a few will fit into your life — and only one should be your life partner. Don’t rush that choice. Take your time. Be calm. Be deliberate.
Sometimes destiny rewards us, and sometimes we face consequences — maybe from karma, maybe from choices. Either way, you are responsible for how you respond. Make your inner place a happy one — not only for yourself, but so you can be a steady presence for others too. But never put your priorities beneath everyone else’s. Put yourself first, and everything else will follow....
