Wearing white may look real bright,
But stains will find you—left or right!
In court, don’t shine with white might,
Wearing black helps, avoiding the fight!
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Chapter 2: Mr. Black and Mr. White
From the mammoth legal satire series
“WHAT A JUDGE CAN NOT JUDGE”
Welcome to another sizzling chapter of courtroom chaos, brewed with sarcasm and served with hot tea. In this episode, we meet two lawyers so different, they make black-and-white TV look colourful. On one side: Mr. Black—so serious he makes court orders look casual. On the other: Mr. White—so bright he needs a stain warning label.
Set in Delhi’s famous Justice Paradise café—where the tea is dangerous and the fans are louder than courtroom objections—this is the tale of sharp suits, sharper tongues, and a drop of tea that caused more drama than a PIL on WhatsApp forwards.
Get ready to sip, laugh, and wonder once again…What a judge can’t judge, the chai definitely will.
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It was a Tuesday in Delhi so hot that the sun had filed a harassment case against the weather department. The kind of heat that could melt traffic signals, fry eggs on footpaths, and bake a biscuit on a scooter seat. Even the crows—usually full of gossip—were silent, sitting in the shade like overheated lawyers after a failed bail plea.
Outside the High Court, where justice sometimes takes years to arrive and parking takes even longer, stood a small restaurant with a grand name—Justice Paradise. It wasn’t much of a paradise. The chairs wobbled, the ceiling fan made sounds like an old scooter, and the food always tasted like it had been prepared during the Emergency. But the tea? The tea was legendary. It was strong, bitter, and sharp—like a legal notice served with lemon.
And that is where two very different lawyers came to have lunch.
The first was Mr. Black. He looked like he had just stepped out of a black-and-white courtroom movie—in full costume. Black coat, black pants, black shoes, black beard, black hair, and a black briefcase so old, it probably had an Aadhaar card of its own. His face was as serious as a Supreme Court bench during contempt hearings. Even his shadow wore a necktie.
The second was Mr. White. When he entered, the room became brighter—not emotionally, but literally. He wore a spotless white shirt, freshly ironed white pants, shiny white leather shoes, white beard, white hair, white brief case and a smile so wide it could file a PIL of its own. He looked like he had been dry-cleaned by angels and delivered by courier straight from a detergent ad.
Mr. Black (squinting):Well, well, well… If it isn’t the ghost of Article 14.Where are you headed? The courtroom or an audition for a milk commercial?
Mr. White (grinning proudly):I’m here to remind the world that justice should be seen, not just heard.And today, justice is looking fabulous.
Mr. Black (chuckling):Fabulous? Brother, you look like a tube light that overdosed on detergent.Seriously, are you representing a client or launching a new brand of toothpaste?
Mr. White (sitting down dramatically):Everyone around here dresses like they’re attending a dark legal ghost exhibition.I like to break the trend.Why mourn in black when you can sparkle in white?
Mr. Black (rolling his eyes):Sparkle? You’re one pigeon away from becoming a walking crime scene.I swear, if Gandhiji saw you, he’d come back and file a PIL on misuse of white khadi.
[Enter the waiter: A tired-looking four times failed law entrance test candidate named "Mr. W". He walks like he’s carrying the weight of unpaid internships and pending casebooks.] He’s holding a metal tray with two cups of tea, shaking like a star witness under cross-examination.
Mr. W: (cautiously):Sir… here’s your tea.But please—handle with care.This tea has a criminal record.Last week it attacked a senior advocate’s white kurta. The poor man’s still in therapy.
Mr. Black (pointing at Mr. White):Then give it to him. He enjoys living dangerously.He probably sprays stain remover as perfume.
Mr. W: (squinting at Mr. White’s outfit):Sir, no offence, but your clothes are brighter than my career options.Honestly, this tea might file defamation if it spills on you.
Mr. White (raising one royal hand):Young man, I have battled samosa oil leaks, mango pickle explosions, and once… even a full glass of buttermilk during a moving train.This tea is just a warm-up act. [He lifts the cup like it’s a piece of evidence in a high-profile trial.]
Mr. White (grandly):Let the record show—justice is fearless.
PLOP!!!!!!!
One single drop of tea escapes, flies through the air like a perfectly timed RTI, and lands smack in the center of Mr. White’s pure white shirt.
[Silence. Time stops.The fan slows down. The flies pause mid-air.Even the pigeon on the window frame lowers its head in shame.]
Mr. Black (face turning red, barely holding in laughter):Oh no. Oh my god.THE DROP has spoken!Your spotless justice just got a character certificate… signed by Chaiwala vs Shirt, 2025!This is the fastest verdict I’ve ever seen!
Mr. White (looking down at the stain):This… this is betrayal.Like Section 420 sent me a love letter.Like contempt of court personally kissed my chest.
Mr. W (softly):Sir, shall I bring napkin… or a bail application?
Mr. Black (laughing uncontrollably):Your honor, I present Exhibit A!One drop of tea, one drop of truth.Guilty of dressing like a detergent ad in a street-side café!
Mr. White (still composed, lifts his chin):This isn’t a stain.It’s proof.Proof that even when you wear white with pride, life—and tea—will test you.But you must smile… and proceed.Case dismissed.
[Both burst out laughing. Even the next table—where two retired judges are sipping sugarless tea—chuckle. One of them whispers, “Objection overruled.”]
Mr. W (nodding seriously):Noted, sir. This café is now a courtroom.I will now take chai orders… under oath.
[The pigeon, not to be left out, poops gently on the Mr. White Shoe.The final judgment—white on white.]
Mr. Black:That pigeon just gave you a footnote, bro.
Mr. White (smiling proudly): Even the birds agree—white attracts white, the justice… and sometimes, natural consequences.
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Respectfully Ridiculous And submitted with humor and humility,By The Lawfing Lawyer,Advocate Ajay Amitabh Suman,Patent and Trademark Attorney,Delhi High Court,Lawfing Tales of Law, Lawyers and Litigation
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
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